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March 13, 2008

Mrs. Spitzer

I posted this over on Eschaton in the comments (in response to: "GOV. LEAVING, WHAT ABOUT WIFE" That's on the teevee (CNN) right now. Maybe not living in New York I've missed something, but I really don't think there's much reason for media focus on her.) but that system doesn't really foster conversation too well, so just so I don't forget it I am re-posting it here:

I really don't understand why the husband's transgressions immediately have people calling for the wife to leave. Isn't a marriage a bond between two people? Isn't that their business? Does visiting a prostitute constitute automatic divorce in the conventional wisdom? Spitzer needs to make things right in his personal life - doesn't he need his wife now more than ever? Don't most vows include the phrase "for better or worse" or something like that? I am making no excuses for the guy - but I would like to think that if something happened like this in my marriage the first reaction wouldn't just be to jump ship - for either party. It seems like a classic American dichotomy - you're either with us, or with the prostitutes. He resigned - it took a little while - but for heaven's sake, let his wife do whatever she sees fit. Maybe she want's to make it (the marriage) work out - for her children's sake - for her sake, whatever. Maybe she loves him to death and she is going to forgive him. Maybe she hates his guts and wants to leave - but really - who business is it now?

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